Let’s not dwell upon what I was doing, or why I have so many wigs strewn about my house. Instead lets turn our attention to the problem at hand.  There is NO good place to keep a wig. And an unexpected wig is a terrifying thing.

This is not a new problem for me, In high school I simultaneously shaved my head and fell in love with a Dorthy wig. You know from the Wizard of Oz. The braids were wide and luxurious, tied with gingham ribbons. Glossy jet black filaments as thick as a horses tail, I just loved that wig…but only briefly, and only because, well this….. It’s not like you can wear a Dorthy wig everyday, so most of the time it “slept” in the bottom drawer of my dresser.  I knew it was there, I PUT IT THERE…and yet, every time I was in a rush looking for a swimsuit or some miraculous extra pair of clean socks, I would open that bottom drawer and scream.

    Even if I opened that drawer prepping myself  ” The wig is in there, alert! the wig is in there” the sight of it would ice my veins. I would catch my breath. It just looked dead.

   The way some people allergic to nuts get an itchy mouth upon ingestion….I have an extreme visceral full body reaction to the sight of an unexpected poorly placed wig.  Except for multi-colored clown wigs…those seem to be ok. Other then that, red, brown, black, blond…doesn’t matter..off head wigs induce willies.  I am fine when it’s on a head…but the minute it lies down in the car seat or the floorboard or the back corner of the cupboard….the heebie jeebies set in.

    I have learned over the years to avoid wig purchase. Don’t get me wrong..I value their existence..I am grateful for the warmth and confidence they give to my various bald friends.  I find their power necessary in transforming a look, or bringing unity to a gaggle of friends….and that is how I let my guard down. Slowly, occasion after occasion snuck up on me and the next thing I know I have 3 curly red pips wigs and a bloody barbie wig in my possession.

   Yesterday I was digging around for fun things to celebrate my friends birthday. And then I forgot about it and today,  while reaching for my wallet I almost pass out! Logically I know CarrotTops severed head is NOT in my bag, but for a minute..it seemed a real possibility.  Later when I came across the apparent murder by tambourine on my desktop I had to shiver.

   I have drawn the conclusion that something needs to be done. We need to develop a NON-CREEPY way to store wigs.  Styrofoam heads do not cut it anymore.  Styrofoam heads are frightening all on their own. You ever walk in on a mannequin in a dark room? You will pee yourself.. Now imagine  just heads looking back at you from the top shelf of a closet… Now try to sleep tonight.   This is my proposal for a non-threatening, well organized wig storing system so that those of us with scary wig sensitivity can simply move on with our lives.
  

I call them “Wig Walls”..I trademarked it. They are mini murals that adhere to your wall and come with a hook kit that you can hang your wig from.  The above samples are “The Happy Camper” “Caveman Can Do It” the “Jungle Prince” and  “The Dirty Hippie” … Note: You can hang 3 wigs on the Dirty Hippie!

For Children or pansy adults I have developed the “Hamster Wheel” The “Sheepdog and French Poodle” as well as the “Jellyfish Fantasy”

Wig Walls are available for $250, make the perfect gift and provide a lifetime of pleasant wig storing pleasure. AND they are NOT creepy….well not as creepy as finding a wig under your laundry pile.

Choose Style

Happy Camper Caveman Can Do It Jungle Prince Dirty Hippy Hamster Wheel Sheepdog French Poodle Jellyfish Fantasy

The above renderings are rough versions of the real WigWalls which are drawn upon request and can be customized with your anticipated hair color.